Thursday, June 26, 2014

Dear Mister Zoeller...

I enjoy writing lengthy, poetic e-mails to my lawmakers in hopes that the unpaid intern being forced to copy/paste replies to it will get some joy out of something moderately purple for what it is. Here's the e-mail I sent to Indiana Attorney General Greg Zoeller (with some personal information starred out), who has requested an emergency stay on Judge Young's decision to strike down Indiana's ban on same-sex marriage:

Attorney General Zoeller,

I was married last August to my husband D***** in a small ceremony here in M*****, Indiana. I will spare you the details, but it was a very casual albeit emotional affair and, legally speaking, it was incredibly simple, due to us being an opposite-sex couple. However while my husband is heterosexual, I myself am not but am in fact pansexual (in short, physical attributes -including sex- have no effect on my attraction to a potential mate - in this case, my monogamous life partner and spouse). That being said, I've had a slight little nagging inside of me from the time we got engaged right up until yesterday, June 25th. "How is it fair," I wondered, "that I should benefit from heterosexual privilege when I myself am not heterosexual?" I felt like I was part of some exclusive married-folks club under pretenses that fall into some not-true, not-false gray area. My marriage, on paper and anatomically speaking, appears "heterosexual", but truth be told, I just happened to fall in love with someone who has different genitalia than myself. But yesterday, something that felt like nothing short of magic happened: Suddenly the passion I feel for my husband was no longer seen as something only heterosexual people are allowed to feel, but ALL people. While I am legally married (again, the whole penis/vagina thing), suddenly I felt like my devotion was finally considered to be a part of the very real human condition. I fell asleep in an Indiana that said people like me didn't have the right to want to spend my life with someone I cannot fathom being without, and I woke up in an Indiana that said, "You are a flesh and blood, living, breathing, feeling, loving human being, just like everybody else. You are a valued Hoosier." Suddenly the pumpkin that was my darling Indiana was a diamond-encrusted, crystal carriage, because someone out there who had the power to said Yes. Yes, you are just as worthy. Yes, you are just as capable. Yes, you.

This is why I beseech you -as a lifelong Hoosier, a voter, a non-heterosexual, and a spouse- to retract your motion for a stay in Judge Young's ruling allowing same-sex partners in Indiana to marry. Marriage is beautiful and sacred, yes, but it is not reserved for only a select few. Being mutually in love with someone is powerful. You feel fearless and full, overcome with warmth and desire and truly believing in your ability to do everything within your tiny body to lasso the moon and pull it down if that's what it takes to make the one you love happier and more fulfilled, if only for a day or an hour or moment. Your love is an unstoppable force, pushing forward like a giant train, heading onward into a seemingly neverending track that only goes forward and for as long as time allows. Philosopher Hannah Arendt summed it up simply by saying, "Love, by its very nature, is unworldly". Mutual, passionate, powerful love is an irresistible force. A ban on same-sex marriage, however, is not an immovable object, as 19 states have already proven. This is not the shield and spear paradox the Republican party, the church, and the homophobic so desperately want it to be. It is a beautiful inevitability that no amount of paper pushing and time wasting and tax dollars spending will change.

Please, Mister Zoeller, do the right thing. Show the rest of the country -hell, the rest of the WORLD- that Indiana recognizes, respects, and celebrates love. Because love does not shrug its shoulders and cut its losses at the steps of the courthouse upon seeing the "Gays use other door" sign. It straightens its shirt, takes a deep breath, and marches on, because it is unstoppable.

Mrs. S**** *. C***
M*****, Indiana

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